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Oct

13

Post-fast show (and a little something for RRR followers)


As I sit here in my sky blue fleece pajamas with clouds shaped like cows jumping over moons and thick red Isotoner-style socks with the no-skid white sticky bumps on the bottom, I can’t settle on one or two or even three items to write about. Because I have so many. I’d hoped that this blog would help me voice – primarily for myself – the ideas that intermingle in my mind. I like to think I know myself well, but in this, I misjudged: with me, ideas are like the Book of Genesis, they beget and beget and beget more ideas.

Likewise with questions. Which is why I know I must deal with this post on Brewed Fresh Daily that relates to the Red Room Revolution.

To recap: Two days ago, I asked questions in this post of mine as a result of listening to and participating in the Cleveland.com live chat with Cathy Panzica on the same day (check Henry Gomez’s Techlink for a link to the chat), and in these comments on BFD later that day. Nikki Di Filippo proffered me a draft response to the comment questions on BFD, but it arrived just a short time before I went on hiatus for the Jewish holiday. She called me and we spoke briefly and frankly. I then sent her a brief review of my impressions of her draft.

After those communications, I’d thought that I’d see her re-draft before she posted it anywhere, but she re-drafted and apparently sent her answer to my BFD comment questions to BFD. At least, that’s what I think transpired. Being Yom Kippur, I’ve not responded – as I told Nikki yesterday that I couldn’t because of the holiday.

As of now, I’ve received no response from RRR on that original blog post of mine (noted above) about my experience at the live chat with Cathy Panzica – which, btw, is what BFD references and Henry Gomez references.

I’ll respond tomorrow to Nikki’s response on BFD because, time after time, I’ve made mistakes when I try to be clear, at night. My brain functions much better in the morning (even without caffeine).

As an important aside, I had a one-on-one with God and nine Torahs earlier this evening, and I’d much rather blog about that. But the truth is, this convoluted way of having some sincere – and what I thought and a few others (who have commented and emailed me privately) thought were legit – questions answered has me twisted up. I’ve always been told I’m too sensitive. But I’ve also always failed to understand how it is that when I try my damnedest to be the best citizen I can – reading up, listening, asking questions, re-directing myself, trying to locate the people with answers – I feel like I get thumbed at.

No – I’m not saying anyone connected to RRR has thumbed me. But I do think that since I’m just a blogging writer and mom in a suburb without millions of dollars in venture capital and no tech industry connections or money or know-how, well…they want to answer me but they want to answer me in a way that is as global as possible.

Unfortunately, I’d like answers that are as specific as possible. I’m hoping we can meet in a place that is more between those two locations than I currently feel we exist.

I do not know either of these women, at all. And I swear, I’m not looking for a fight. But my internal dialogue goes something like this: I’m the same age as Cathy P, with kids and I live in a suburb and I’m a lawyer. She lives in a suburb, has kids and is a lawyer. I’d think she might relate as well as respond to me. What gives?

What gives? Well, as I alluded to before, I don’t rank much. And you know, that’s okay. I’m not looking to rank. But I would really like to know about the possibility of a PhD in tech. Because you know what? I do think I can contribute at least as much as displaced workers with no tech background.

Maybe more. Look how provocative just one blog entry became.

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By Jill Miller Zimon at 8:08 pm October 13th, 2005 in Politics 

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