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I worked in a burger chain for a year when I was in high school, but I still wouldn’t take Mark Naymik’s analogy as a compliment in his end of year (or beginning of year?) column about Ohio politics. On Secretary of State Jennifer Brunner’s actions in NEO, he writes:
But having pledged to manage the change in Cuyahoga County, she’s now acting like a CEO of a burger chain who has decided to run one of its largest franchises. She’ll soon discover it’s hard to improve the quality of the food when you have to handle the drive-thru and clean the bathrooms.
Brunner is trying to improve the quality of what’s being provided (election services). And we could say that while profit isn’t her motive, a trust dividend is: getting more people to vote and believe in and use the system.
And I know, I know – Ray Kroc’s billions of burgers and money is nothing to sneer at.
And her goals are fine – the Ohio Board of Elections has divisions like a large franchise.
But still. There’s just something – okay, I’ll say it – unsavory about the comparison.
Is it apt? Eh. But as a writer, I have to believe, there’s something better out there. I would have kept looking.
Couldn’t Naymik at least have used Starbucks? Or Panera? He did only highlight quality, drive-thrus and bathrooms…
By Jill Miller Zimon at 8:51 pm January 1st, 2008 in Elections, Government, Media, Ohio, Politics, WH2008
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9 Responses to “Burger chain is to board of elections as sec’y of state is to burger franchise owner?”
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… painfully extending the analogy:
For those who work in the polls (as I have since 2004) it’s like every time you come to work, the menu is completely different. In the front of the house, the customers not only have to deal with the new items, they are forced to learn a new ordering procedure because the chain has also changed out the cash registers and the way customers pay.
The folks in the kitchen aren’t having any fun either. They got about an hour’s training on the new menu and new kitchen equipment before coming to work. There’s not much time to learn on the job as there are 100 customers lined up at the door by the time you open.
About the time everyone figures it out, it’s closing time. The workers go home exhausted since they’ve been there from 5:30am to 8pm.
And tomorrow will be a new day with yet another new menu, new equipment, new procedures, and new frustrations for everyone.
It sure would be nice if the guys in the ivory tower could figure this thing out.
oh, and I missed one….
The guys in the ivory tower get fired with some regularity, and the new guys always want to change something. Maybe it’s better. Maybe it’s just different.
It’s a wonder the customers put up with it.
PL
Shalom Jill,
Here the analogy I’d use.
It’s night. It’s raining cats and dogs. The river is rising. The bridge is washed out and Brunner is standing in the middle of the tracks waving a guttering candle as the Cuyahoga Voter Express high-balls it toward the rushing waters.
The wreck, when it happens will not be pretty.
I’ll be voting absentee this time around.
Look for Brunner’s head on a pike.
B’shalom,
Jeff
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Nice extention, Paul! But do you agree – it didn’t have to be burgers?
I mean, Starbucks changes those boards all the time (yes, I’m providing evidence that I’m in there enough to know).
Thanks, Jeff. If I read that comment correctly, it really wouldn’t matter who is holding the candle?
I would have preferred a Porsche dealership as an analogy…
By the way, my business makes internet-controlled electronic signs….
PL
Oooo – Porsche dealership! I like that! Mark – Naymik – Porsche dealership next time??
Shalom Jill,
No. A guttering candle isn’t going to prevent the train wreck that Cuyahoga County have become.
But I’d like to think, to flog the analogy further, that another leader might have put a string of police cruisers on both sides of the track with their brights all shining on the engine and a ton of flares on the tracks.
We are now more than three years past the 2004 recount (which I took part in) and I don’t feel any more secure that my vote will be properly counted.
If it were me I would do three things:
First, scrap ALL voting machines and print paper ballots to be marked with a standard No. 2 pencil.
Second, put transparent ballot boxes in each polling place with a a police office assigned to each box who would treat the box as evidence in a murder investigation, i.e. ensure the chain of custody of the ballots.
Third, I would open and count the ballots at the polling place and have a team of five, party diverse, poll workers count the ballots, prepare a provisional tally sheet, return the ballots to the transparent ballot box, seal the box and affix the tally sheet to the top of the box. The police office would then transport the box to the board of elections.
Fourth, at the Board of Elections the ballots would be again hand counted. If this takes two weeks to complete, so be it.
How much will this cost? I don’t care. Freedom and Democracy ought not to be subject to a Wal-Martesque every day low price mentality.
Besides, there’s all that money from the recent increase in the sales tax lying around. Have you heard any mention of Medmart since the increase?
B’shalom,
Jeff